Truth or Dare?
by besnaped
Summary: Yet another response to Severitus' challenge! Hopefully won't be just the usual sort of deja vu. "Whom would you rather have for a father: You-Know-Who, Filch, Snape or Lockhart?" CHAPTER 5: SNAPE TELLS HIS STORY!
1. Truth or Dare.

© Besnaped.  
  
Disclaimer: All characters belong to JKR. Written in response to Severitus' challenge.  
  
A/N: I either need a beta, or all you readers to point out my mistakes for me to correct.   
  
  
Chapter 1. Truth or Dare.  
  
  
"Whom would you rather have for a father: You-Know-Who, Filch, Snape or Lockhart?"  
  
The Gryffindor trio were sitting in the Gryffindor common room and, after days of being pestered by Hermione for never anymore having activities that would involve all three of them at a time, were now playing "Truth or Dare". It was Hermione's turn to ask and, inspired by the soap operas she'd been forced to watch during family dinners for the most of her summer, the ridiculous situation in which one discovers their parents are not their real parents was only to be expected to be one of the first in finding its way from the top of her mind to the tip of her tongue. Hence, the question, which to make matters worse also happened to rhyme. "Whom would you rather have for a father: You-Know-Who, Filch, Snape or Lockhart?"  
  
Harry laughed at the last. "Definitely Snape," he answered lightly, causing Ron's eyes to bulge in horror and laughing again at the sight.  
  
"No way, Harry!!! How can you even say that!" Ron sputtered, nearly choking on his own words.  
  
"Well, what else could I answer?" Harry shrugged. "I certainly wouldn't want to be the next Dark Lord, but neither would I like being a squib. That would mean that I'd never get my letter from Hogwarts and would have to live with the Dursleys forever and attend St. Brutus's Secure Center for Incurably Criminal Boys instead. While Lockhart would probably obliviate me every day for practice and make me curl my hair. And that only leaves Snape! Though then I would probably have to live in the dungeons and brew potions all day. Even so, out of Snape and Lockhart -- better Snape." Harry concluded, hoping that his explanation sounded sensible.  
  
"Wow, Harry, I don't know. That's just creepy." Ron shuddered. "How does it occur to you ask such questions, Hermione?" He now was outraged. "That's it! I'm not answering any of the questions YOU come up with. Make mine a dare."   
  
"Very well then, I have just the perfect dare for you, Ron: get on with your Transfiguration essay!" she immediately countered without so much as blinking an eye.  
  
"Oh, no!" Ron groaned. "You had to bring THAT up, didn't you?"  
  
Harry couldn't help but notice that Ron looked horribly eager now that it was his turn to ask a question. He'd been fidgeting on his seat waiting for Harry to choose between truth or dare. That could not be good. 'Something must be on Ron's mind,' Harry resolved, 'something really embarrassing at that, like asking about Cho.' No, Ron definitely knew or suspected too many things he'd rather keep from the rest of common room or even from Hermione. 'Better not risk it.'   
  
"Dare!" he declared out loud.  
  
But instead of looking put out Ron only grinned almost enough for his ears to fall off. It seemed like call for dare was exactly what he was expecting. With open conceit he smugly announced what was supposed to be one of his greatest ideas, spoiling the solemnity of the moment when his voice turned to squeak at the end, out of trying to contend the laughter. "Throw a Filibuster firecracker into Malfoy's cauldron during the next Po- Potions."  
  
Harry's expression just started changing from highly discomforted to mildly entertained when Hermione felt it was her duty, what with her being the voice of reason of the trio, to put end to this inane merriment. "I have to remind you that according to our rules, questions must be fair and dares safe. They should not lead to death, expulsion or negative house points." She listed with an annoyed tone and stern face. "And knowing Snape, he'll inflict all three upon you if you are senseless enough to go ahead with this plan. And he doesn't even need to know it was Harry! He would have no second thoughts in blaming something like this on him, even if it weren't."  
  
Though reluctantly, both boys had to admit she had a point. "You just have to be such a spoilsport, don't you, Hermione?" Ron's posture was a mock mix of irritation and disappointment. "Now we'll never know what Draco looks like covered with some poisonous goo," he pouted.  
  
"I still doubt the sight is worth getting expelled," Hermione retorted full of reproach.   
  
After some more reasoning on part of Hermione, the dare has been changed to snicking out to the kitchens for some food. Thanks to Harry's cloak, this didn't present a challenge, so that 20 minutes later all three of them were stuffed with chocolate cookies.   
  
Harry rolled his eyes when Ron asked Hermione whether she continued interested in Viktor Krum. "You shouldn't resent Krum so much," Harry told Ron later that night when they both were in the boys dormitory and couldn't be overheard by Hermione." It was only because of him that you'd finally noticed Hermione in first place, and now she is no longer in a relationship with him."   
  
This retort, of course, only earned him a good smack on the face with a pillow, for as expected, Ron resorted to hiding his feelings for Hermione in a display of anger towards Harry. But Harry didn't mind the half-hearted anger of his friends. What he was really getting tired of was their so blatantly being in love with each other while refusing to admit it even to themselves. He just rolled his eyes again and threw the pillow back at Ron.  
  
  
A/N: All corrections, suggestions and comments are welcomed and begged for. Thanks for reading!  
A/N: Special thanks to the reviewer Ariana Deralte who has already pointed out some of the mistakes. I corrected what I could. My problem is that English is not my first language. Sorry. I'll keep trying my best, but you, dear reviewers, will probably still need correcting. Thanks!  
  
© Besnaped. 


	2. Truth or Dare all over.

© Besnaped.  
  
Disclaimer: All characters belong to JKR. Written in response to Severitus' challenge.  
  
A/N: I either need a beta, or all you readers to point out my mistakes for me to correct, especially since English is not my first language. Thousand thanks to all who already did so and to everybody else who reviewed!  
  
  
Chapter 2. Truth or Dare all over.  
  
  
"Potter! Stay behind," Snape called at the end of the class after a bewildered Harry. What had he done wrong this time?!  
  
With a wipe of a hand towards the door to his office, Snape wordlessly invited Harry in, following and settling himself behind a huge carved desk. "Sit down --" little pause, "Harry." Harry's brows shot up the ceiling.   
  
Snape's tone was very grave and his expression lacked its usual sneer. "There is something I need to tell you."  
  
Harry was stunned. This didn't seem about the class or any rule infraction that could be blamed on Harry. Snape would be only too happy to have an opportunity to get Harry expelled. He would be gloating, never sad. Whatever could have happened that it was so hard for his normally implacable Potions Master to break the news! Hell, he didn't even get angry when Harry failed to take a seat at the man's first request.  
  
"First of all, let me explain my continuous behaviour or rather lack thereof towards you and your friends," Snape spoke and Harry didn't manage to detect any of his usual sarcasm in Snape's voice as much as he tried. "As you know, I have to keep appearances in front of my House, since many of them come from families loyal to your worst enemy, and it is not myself. You will understand that it would not be wise of me to fawn on the boy-who-lived under scrutiny of such an audience. I am far from hating you, but I could not let you know earlier, because they needed to see you also act on my charade rather than on my true feelings. I do not hope for forgiveness, but I must apologise nevertheless." He paused at that, watchful for Harry's reaction.  
  
"I-I f-forgive you," Harry stuttered self-consciously, lowering his eyes under professor's expectant gaze. It felt so weird having his rigid teacher asking for forgiveness. He felt some power over Snape at that moment and couldn't bear it. Snape was the most imposing figure he could possibly imagine, and standing above him was decidedly a screaming sign that something was not all right with the world. He dreaded the professor's next words.  
  
Snape groaned at Harry's complaisance, at Harry's uncertainty, at his own outright pathetic display of need to be understood and accepted by the boy. He did not know if he could continue with the rest of his confessions at once. Oh, he very well knew that this charade could not go on! The boy was living a life of lies and it was turning out that not even they were bringing any good. He'd hoped that removing himself from boy's life would make it a happier one, but instead he turned him in for a life of abuse. He should have checked on him, should have checked on his son. Now his son would have both: lies AND abuse. HAD have. He'd had to make sure not to commit another mistake with Harry, Merlin knows the boy had already had more than a fair share of pain.  
  
"As you may suspect, there are several things concerning your existence that are being kept from you. The one I may no longer leave untold is bound to change your life forever, and I don't think it will be a sort of change you might welcome. No one would blame you if you prefer to never know for sure and continue with your life of blissful deceit, but if you must know the truth I want you to believe first that I for one do care for you and will do everything in my power to help you adjust, Harry." He wanted to reaffirm the sincerity of his words by calling the boy's given name.  
  
Harry's mind was reeling. Was he dying of some incurable disease? Was he related to Voldemort? Was he going to be expelled? Why was it Snape telling him this? Could he believe him? "I choose the truth," he choked out, voice hoarse, eyes wide and hazed.  
  
"Harry," Snape began but couldn't quite bring himself to continue. "Harry," he started once again, "Harry, I am your father."  
  
Now Harry was convinced that he was dreaming. Sleeping and having a nightmare inspired by their game of the previous evening. He has still not woken up into a new day. Of course, that was now very obvious to him. First Snape forgets to be snide to him and even apologises, then practically asks to choose between truth or dare, and finally for the crowning touch claims being Harry's real father. Harry shook his head and pinched himself hard.  
  
"If you are wondering whether you are dreaming, I assure you this is not a dream," Snape said with a trace of bitterness. 'Of course, having me for a father is no one's dream,' he silently quipped to himself. He sat there intent on the reaction of his son and became utterly terrified when all of a sudden Harry burst out laughing. "Out of Snape and Lockhart -- better Snape!" Harry forced out hysterically.  
  
"The boy'd lost it," was all Snape could think. "The disgust and the shock were so much that he'd lost it."  
  
Blinking out tears of laughter, Harry finally took in Snape's pained expression and suddenly had to grip the edge of the desk in front of himself to keep from accidentally falling forward in his chair and smashing his face on the dark wood of the desk. Snape was instantly behind his son, holding him by the shoulders while Harry tried to breathe. "You'll be all right. It's just the shock," Harry heard Snape whispering, voice trembling. And then he heard or saw nothing more.  
  
  
A/N: All corrections, suggestions and comments are welcomed and begged for. Thanks for reading! Kiss and bow for reviewing! By the way, I really, REALLY NEED TO KNOW YOUR OPINION on this part, thanks!!  
Oh, and read my other stuff also, people who'd done so said they liked it, so enjoy!  
  
© Besnaped. 


	3. Not Truth or Dare again?!

© Besnaped.  
  
Disclaimer: All characters belong to JKR. Written in response to Severitus' challenge.  
  
A/N: I either need a beta, or all you readers to point out my mistakes for me to correct. Huge big enormous thanks to Ariana Deralte for betaing my English in her reviews!   
  
A/N: What about the Star Wars allusion in the previous chapter, I must confess, yes, I was kinda inspired by Darth Vader. But I haven't known that myself till I finished the chapter. I had it all planned much less abrupt. AS HAD SNAPE. He might muse on that in chapter 8. Soon.  
  
A/N: Guys! I'm so excited with your kind reviews! Keep posting them and I might even follow your example and turn a nicer person myself! I love you guys! I DEDICATE MY WRITING TO MY READERS, yeah! Hope you keep liking it.   
  
  
Chapter 3. Not Truth or Dare again?!  
  
  
Harry awoke to the sensation of Madame Pomfrey slapping him ever so gently on his hands, to the pleasant smell of chocolate coming from the steaming mug on the desk in front of him, and to the realisation that he STILL was NOT waking up in his bed but coming out of shock in the Professor Snape's office. His head snapped around, eyes scanning for said professor. Snape has retreated to the faraway corner of the room and his pose held a mark of uncertainty, as though he were afraid of coming out of his corner, of approaching the nurse. Of disturbing Harry further perhaps?   
  
Eyes wider than ever before, Harry let Madame Pomfrey throw back his head and pour the hot chocolate down his throat.  
  
"Really, Severus," she snapped. "You are going to end up killing some student with fright! I am reporting this to the Headmaster. Are you feeling ready to walk, Mr. Potter?"  
  
Harry shook his head frantically.  
  
"No? Do you need another moment? Can you talk?" Madame Pomfrey has bent upon him and was now squinting straight into his pupils.  
  
"I will stay," his voice was a hoarse whisper. "I'll stay here," he repeated a bit stronger seeing the disbelief in nurse's eyes.  
  
"I'm afraid I cannot allow that. Given your reaction to whatever this man did to you, you need to be removed from the origin of your stress, unless we want your emotional state to worsen. You are obviously still in shock and are either not yet fully aware of the situation or blatantly afraid. Now, let's get you out of here to some place more pleasant." She sounded adamant, but at the last words her voice softened and she took Harry by an elbow, tugging him from the chair.  
  
Harry pulled back, resisting the tug. "No, it's all right, Madame Pomfrey! I'm fine, seriously," he protested finding his voice in an effort to sound normal.  
  
"Harry! You are not making sense!" she bristled. "I cannot just leave you here and allow this man to continue his abuse!"  
  
Harry turned over to look at Snape. Professor's eyes were closed shut. Sensing Harry's questioning stare he opened his eyes and spoke in a distinctly strained tone. "It's all right, Harry. Maybe you should go with Madame Pomfrey."  
  
Harry was beside himself with indignation. "You said you'd help me cope! And when I choose the truth you just spring the news on me and want me go away!" Tears were streaming down his face.  
  
Snape tore himself form the corner and towards Harry. Pushing Pomfrey's hands away and ignoring her shrieks, he was now on his knees silently holding in tight embrace the trembling form of his son, not hearing anything but the sobs of the distressed child in his arms. "I choose the truth," Harry was mumbling, "I choose the truth."  
  
  
A/N: May be a little short? But don't worry, the next update shouldn't take long.  
A/N: All corrections, suggestions and comments are welcomed and begged for. Thanks for reading! And I simply love you for reviewing!   
P.S.: Read my other stuff too, will ya?  
  
© Besnaped. 


	4. I Dare you to the Truth!

© Besnaped.  
  
Disclaimer: All characters belong to JKR. Written in response to Severitus' challenge.  
  
A/N: TO ARIANA DERALTE: I'm eternally grateful for your betaing!  
A/N: TO TEIGRA: Thanks for offering being my beta!  
  
A/N: TO EVERYONE: If you feel like something needs correcting, by all means do let me know!  
  
A/N: TO ALL MY REVIEWERS: Guys, your reviews is what impulses me to write. You have only yourselves to thank for my updates. I trust you already know what to do if you want another update soon.  
  
A/N: TO THE REST OF THE READERS: And you, why haven't you reviewed? Don't you like it? Well, then never mind. I'm sorry.  
  
  
Chapter 4. I Dare you to the Truth!  
  
  
Some moments later Harry found himself sitting again in front of Snape's desk with Snape behind it. Harry's face was dry once more and Snape appeared as unmoved as ever, making Harry wonder for a split second whether anything of what has just happened in this very room, had indeed happened.  
  
Snape considered sitting in front of Harry on the same side of the desk, but immediately decided against it. He'd given too much ground already. Yes, he was Harry's father, and yes, his hate towards Harry was merely an act for Death Eaters' benefit. But not all of his everyday behaviour was a facade. He indeed had a dark sense of humour nourishing his innate sarcasm, he strongly believed in discipline, preferring punishments to rewards, was of markedly asocial nature and could be found in a foul brooding mood more often then not. He was still Harry's teacher; with a reputation to maintain. And he had really forgotten HOW to feel. He had a responsibility towards the boy, that was one thing he knew. But no words of comfort would form. He just sat there in silence, gaze turned to his son, and there was nothing on his tongue, on his face, in his eyes or in his heart.  
  
"Prove it," the boy under his gaze practically spat.  
  
"Certainly. We could always call Madame Pomfrey again and have her perform the consanguinity test --"  
  
"No, that's not what I mean. Well, maybe that too, but that's not what I wanted to ask. How did it happen? How can you be my father? How come I look like James? Is Lily my mother? Have you always known? Why haven't you ever told me before? Why are you telling me now? Why did I have to live with the Dursleys? Am I even related to them? What will happen now? Does anyone else know? Does Dumbledore --"  
  
Once Harry started asking he could not stop. It was hard to believe that only moments ago it had seemed almost impossible to think of something to say. Harry was getting more and more agitated, speaking faster and faster. Snape was forced to interrupt. "Mr. Potter!" he exclaimed without thinking. There was a stunned pause during which Snape has realised his mistake and even got to think that it would have been better if he'd yelled 'Mr. Creevey' instead, after all it was him whom the boy had reminded him of at that moment.   
  
"I'm not," Harry finally stated. "I'm a Snape," he allowed ever so simply.   
  
Snape stared. And stared. Stared some more. Harry cleared his throat.   
  
"Right," Snape at last seemed to come out of his stupor. He cleared his throat too. "I've prepared a pensieve to show you."  
  
"Thanks. But at the moment I would prefer to hear it from you."  
  
'Speaking of truth or dare,' Harry thought. He just witnessed Snape freezing two minutes ago and he thought he'd caught glimpses of something akin to sadness or even concern during the first part of their talk. Didn't Snape EMBRACE him? Yet now he was just sitting there with a stone face and staring, and Harry was beginning to doubt if he hadn't just hallucinated the whole thing. He wanted to see if he was able to trigger some emotional response from the man. He needed to KNOW that the whole issue mattered to Snape, no -- his father, at least an iota of what it did for him!  
  
Momentarily Snape was at a loss again. He had not anticipated this, and now he was trying to figure out what Potter, no -- Snape, no -- Harry, was attempting to play to. But no matter the game, the boy's request was only fair. He'd had to comply. Snape concentrated hard, brows knitted in thought, and began his narration.  
  
  
A/N: Next chapter sounds tough. And longer. Ok, I have to think now.   
A/N: For those who've offered help and for those trying to convince me to write longer chapters, start thinking on the secondary plot for this story, that would provide some background events during which I could present my ideas on how Harry and Severus get to know each other, develop some tender feelings and work on their father/son relationship. Situations that would include the rest of the characters, besides these two? I haven't decided what to do with Lupin, how to include him in all this. And you want him, don't you? Don't get me wrong, I know exactly where I'm headed so far, I'm just not so sure yet about what's going to happen next. Something's gonna happen though, never fear. I hope.  
  
A/N: All corrections, suggestions and comments are welcomed and begged for. THANKS for reading and even more so for reviewing! Take a look at my other stuff too.  
  
© Besnaped. 


	5. Severus' monologue or Truth or Dare inde...

© Besnaped.  
  
Disclaimer: All characters belong to JKR. Written in response to Severitus' challenge.  
  
A/N: I'm so flattered, I've got two whole betas now! Enormous thanks to ARIANA DERALTE and TEIGRA for their invaluable help! *smiles and sighs blissfully*  
  
  
  
Chapter 5. Severus' monologue or Truth or Dare indeed.  
  
  
"I think, I better start at the beginning then," Snape said shifting his gaze to rest on the polished surface of the table.  
  
"Some months after my graduation from Hogwarts I was moving out of my parents manor to start an independent life in an apartment of my own. I had all my belongings with me and therefore decided that Knight Bus would be the most suitable choice of transportation. I took the bed at the very end, of course, hoping not to be disturbed. As if I would ever be that lucky!" Snape wanted to sneer but stopped in mid-contortion and sighed to himself. "Well, maybe I WAS lucky," he said barely audibly. He raised his head to look into Harry's emerald eyes and lowered his gaze once more. "Anyhow, now comes the part YOU are interested in," Snape sighed again and decided immediately that he should stop sighing so often.  
  
"I was just beginning to feel relaxed enough to be able to ignore the atrocious jolts that confounded form of transport is always giving, which is no wonder considering the incompetent good-for-nothing chumps it has for drivers, who are only at it because they'd failed in school and in everything else... " But he couldn't procrastinate forever, and so he restarted: "I was just beginning to feel relaxed when the rough scrape of a trunk being shoved under the bed across the aisle brought me back to reality. I opened my eyes to see that the offender was a woman. Finished with her trunk, she twirled and a few drops of water flew in my direction from her robes drenched with rain. That woman was Lily. I recognised her at once as she did with myself, for it was less than a year since we'd last seen each other at school. 'Severus!' she exclaimed then a little too eagerly. That couldn't be right, she was never excited to see me before. Being dragged into some cheerful school remembrances session was not my idea of an enjoyable journey, so I just grumbled unpleasantly, expecting to scare her off, and made to turn away. Lily, however, was determined to amuse herself at my expense and so she tugged at my sleeve and launched into a chirruping interrogation on how I'd been and what I'd done. I didn't know what to make of her sudden unexplainable and downright unwelcome interest in my persona, so all I offered in return was some tart enquiry on the health of her fiance and co. Her response was nothing like I expected. I was so surprised at her calling James something that I should not repeat to you and that I had never expected out of HER mouth, and referring to James' and her friends as 'traitorous meddlesome chauvinism supporters', that I forgot to prevent her subsequent unbidden explanation of how her fiance's repeated inattentiveness brought to her breaking the engagement and moving out. She'd been appalled then to discover that not only all James' and James' and her, but even all HER friends who also knew James sided with her ex-fiance pronouncing HER conduct scandalising and her decision rushed, pestering her with continuous insistences to come to her senses and talk with James, James himself urging her to not overreact, to be rational and to behave. She found herself in a dead end situation, judged and confronted by everybody she knew, the only two alternatives out of which were comply or run; and so she ran.   
  
"I was dreading she would end her outpour sobbing into my shoulder, but Lily just tossed her head in rebellion and forced a smile, changing the topic back to me. Still wary that she might break into hysterics, I was forced to play along and actively maintain a rather cheerful conversation. Then, somehow, the topic was Lily again: Lily and her despair on what would she do next, on where would she go, where would she stay. Was she to return to her, as it turned out, hateful relatives in the Muggle world? Was she to remain in the wizarding London and apply for a job? The only thing she was certain of was her decision to avoid anyone who would condemn her break up with James and think of making her see just how foolish she was being. That totally explained her interest in me -- one thing I would never do is to praise James, a fact she was well aware of. She was evidently thrilled to meet someone like myself, as it reminded her that there were people out there she could say she was acquainted with, however vaguely that was, but who would, if anything, only approve of her decision to shun James.  
  
"Finally, it was my stop and, I never knew how that happened myself, but somehow, while attempting some pleasantry at excusing myself, I let slip something akin to an offer for Lily to spend the night at my place. I was slightly overwhelmed by her exhilaration at meeting me of all people, what with it not being a common reaction to my persona, so that I can't be entirely sure my offer was as rhetoric as I tried to convince myself; however, I certainly had not had in mind anything of what happened between us following that fateful proposition. I had never even looked at her that way. She was always smart and pretty, and nice to practically everyone, but apart from whatever opinion we could have formed of one another based on whom we related to, Lily and I were two complete strangers whose lives had never collided directly before that, both of us revolving in very different circles and giving each other no thought."  
  
Snape remained pensive for several moments, seeming oblivious to Harry's presence, then he intertwined his fingers and continued, not even once looking up to meet his eyes. Harry, in turn, tried to make his presence as unobtrusive as possible, not daring to interrupt the other man's concentration with a careless breath or movement.  
  
"I wasn't yet settled in my new place and the only peace of furniture I had so far was one bed. I assured Lily that there was another bed in another room and went to sleep in an improvised nest of blankets on the floor. She discovered my deception in the morning. Everything I had was in boxes and there was no food. We went out for breakfast and then also to buy some provisions for later in the afternoon. When we came back, instead of leaving immediately Lily insisted on helping me unpack and set the apartment up in gratitude for my kindness the previous evening. I refused at first but she brooked no resistance. As it was, the night fell once more but we still weren't finished. That night I slept on a couch.  
  
"The following morning I awoke to the smells of her cooking -- she'd easily made herself at home in MY kitchen where I had yet to step for the first time. The quality of food, though, made it impossible to complain. That and her interminable rambling, mainly on the topic of my lack of decorations. After breakfast I was dragged to buy some paintings, carpets and flowers, and to shorten my torture I gave in and let Lily choose. Later, while we were at decorating my apartment with the acquisitions of that day, she went on and on about how understanding I was being, how I never even mentioned Quidditch, how I was not spending all day out with friends, having them at house all evening and discussing THEM all night, how I was listening to what SHE was saying, how I was allowing HER to make decisions, how I was so different from James... How he'd got used to her always at his side, how he'd taken her for granted, how everyone but me refused to see her for something more than a mere appendage of his, to treat her as a person of her own, to grant her the right to be on her own, as a person of her own, on her own, without James... And then it was how I was so much BETTER than James and how she'd never got to know me, how she'd always had a distorted impression of me, how she'd always seen me through the eyes of James and his friends, and how prejudiced they all were, and how they all just always sided with James... How her eyes were open now, how she now saw them all for what they were, how she'd finally seen ME through her own eyes, how she'd suddenly realised that she'd never really felt before, how she'd finally understood WHAT feeling was... The next moment she was all over me and I didn't resist much. And so she stayed for another night.  
  
"She didn't want to leave. Day to day she was looking for new excuses to stay and after some time I started finding them for her. We were both starting a new life and a new home together. Our lives were one now, WE were one. WE were US.  
  
"Somewhere on the back of my mind I understood that this all was too sudden, too out of the blue, that she was on rebound, confused and not truly feeling what she sincerely believed she did. It's a defensive mechanism of human heart, you see. When it hurts too much, it sizes even the tiniest of pretexts to avoid that pain, tries to drawn the suffering in joys, diminishes the misery to a void by intensifying small feelings of pleasure to the point at which they seem nothing less than true love. Merely a natural self-preservation instinct. Most obvious. But I would look into the warmth in her eyes and all my cold reasoning would melt. I would forget to think." By this point Severus was telling the story of his love to anyone but himself. His tone was soft, his skyward eyes glazed, lost in dreams and memories.  
  
"The Fates were offering me a dare, and I knew it. But I took it, hoping I could change it into truth. It was a foolish thing to believe. She realised her mistake as soon as James found her and crawled to her, snivelling on and about how wrong and full of himself he'd been (something I always said of him) and how he'd rethought his priorities. I was out of the picture even faster than I made it into it. Left alone in a house full of flowers and sunlight..."  
  
He'd never felt the need for company until the one woman he dared to love showed him the true meaning of loneliness.  
  
  
  
A/N: Here you are supposed to start crying. If not, I will. *sobs* How do you think Harry might feel about Severus' story? How did you feel about it? I figured, not everything in the world should be Snape's fault, right? Conclusion of Snape's side of his and Lily's story in the next chapter.  
  
A/N: All corrections, suggestions and comments are welcomed and begged for. THANKS for reading and even more so for reviewing! Take a look at my other stuff too, it won't take you long.  
  
© Besnaped. 


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